High Performance Leadership: Lessons From The Under 14s
“I don’t watch Carlton games.” Looking me dead in the eye, with that disdainful expression that only teenage girls can perfect, forward pocket Sammy rejected my suggestion she might learn from Corey Durdin’s small forward craft for Carlton. She loves the Swans. And she knows my heart lies with the Blues, so she knows what she’s doing when she rejects my team. And while she wasn’t trying to upset me, she certainly wasn’t going to temper her message to accommodate my feelings.
Welcome to coaching under 14s footy, where feedback is authentic and immediate. The Swans’ John Longmire and Geelong’s Chris Scott are under premiership pressure this week, sure, but community footy puts a spark under the leadership powder keg of kids, hormones, parents and L-plate umpires. So what do we learn from weekend coaching that makes us better leaders during the wage-slave week?
A leader must be clear on what matters then reinforce it with narrative, symbols and standards. Coach Taylor knew, “success is not a goal, it’s a by-product”. Focus on the controllables: effort, standards and treating each other well. The rest is out of your hands.
Our weekly peer-nominated award, Power Move Of The Week, is a symbol of what's important to us: powerful effort. A repeat winner this season is Ali. New to AFL but with a rugby background, she was initially hesitant with kicks and handballs. But she used what she had: her relentless attempts at tackles in the back pocket became legendary and inspired others to have a go.
Set and maintain standards. Talking while another player is talking? Off you go for a lap around the oval. That’s plain disrespectful. At work, it’s the equivalent of regularly being late for meetings. What are you doing to ensure everyone’s time and effort is respected?
How you treat each other matters more than anything. So, we always meet players where they are. Don’t pretend everyone has equal capability: it’s condescending. If you think your team doesn’t know who amongst them is better, you’re out of your mind. Give the more experienced team members harder jobs so they develop and inspire. And for the emerging talent, highlight their other contributions, like when rookie Bella halted the post-match song and ordered the huddle to move to surround injured Clara so she could participate. How hard do you think Clara worked for her teammates after that? You have those moments of magic in your team. Reward them.
“A leader must be clear on what matters then reinforce it with narrative, symbols and standards.”
As surely as Carlton will wrest defeat from the jaws of victory, injustices will occur. Kipling had the right slant: keep your head. If you can do that when you lose by 48 in the first semi as your key midfielder suffers a season-ending injury, you’ll navigate the next boardroom dust-up with Obama-level silkiness.
In that moment, too many leaders blame their teams. But they’re only in the team because you put them there. So, look at your own leadership first: what mistakes did you make? What do you need to face about yourself? Tell your team and ask them to tell you. We all make mistakes. It’s what you do next that matters.
In that semi final, I was too slow to make changes: I forgot to ask for help and collaborate with my co-coach. I told the team that. The players admitted that mostly they had been too complacent.
Then, trusting that defeats are given to us to make us better, ask yourself and the team to find the benefits of disaster. Ever missed out on a job you “should have got”? Ever had to defend your work because someone has white-anted you? The key is to learn, without a grudge, and commit being better. After the semi final, the floodgates opened, like this great example from Anna: “I was appealing to the umpire to protect Lou, but from now on I’ll just run in and protect her. And next time I get pushed, I’m not going to let it intimidate me. I’m going to push back.”
The great thing for any leader is to bring the love. Love what you’re doing, and everyone will love it with you. Pacino was right: you can’t do it for them. At that first bounce, it comes down to 30 kids and a Sherrin. Your only hope is that your 15 love their jobs more. Heroes will emerge. We turned a 48-point semi final defeat into a 48-point grand final victory against the same team, two weeks later. Our girls were not footballers that day, they were warriors. That only comes from love of the game and each other. And Sammy’s forward craft resulted in her best two goals ever. She was, well, Durdin-esque.
